Financial support in girlfriend.

[nookiebear]

The mystery deepens.

Kees now tells us that his girl is NOT paying 7000bt to his girls parents (No 1 family), but instead to her No 2 family, living in the Buriram area, and comprising uncles, aunts nephews, nieces etc. I think this is the first time you mentioned that Kees.

"For that money I suppose she gets food, sleeping place, use of the house, toilet, bathroom for her and her daughter"

Well Kees, to answer your original question, now that we have more information:

"She is staying with her daughter (4years) with family now, which are asking her 7000 Baht/month to stay there. Is that a reasonable price? "

NO! It is not a reasonable price. It's a rip off! Let her rent a room,or even a small house in the Buriram area (considerably less than 7000bt) and live there with her daughter, and you when you find the time to visit.

Nick ,why waste your time mate...A guy who has actually been to Thailand 3 times & knows everything....Decent houses are rented here in Nong Ki /Sakut for around 1500 baht/month

[manni]

Kees, I think most of the guys on the board would agree that there's a bit of a natural progression in the purchases we have made for our wives/girlfriends.  First the latest mobile, then a bit of gold jewelry, then the motorbike, then the pickup, then the house and then finally we invest in the poorly thought out business they are totally unqualified to own and operate. The vast majority of these businesses fail to ever make a profit and are eventually scrapped (usually sooner rather than later).

The rest of the gents in this thread are subjecting you to a bit of banter not just because you screwed up the order of the essential Thai girl purchases, but because of the scale of your error. 450,000 baht is an absolutely enormous amount of money to a rural Thai girl in her situation.  I understand and commend you for your good intentions, but you have now created a certain set of expectations amongst her and her family. Hopefully, everything works out well for you but, I think most of the guys on the board would agree that in these situations good deeds rarely go unpunished and good intentions are even less frequently appreciated.

[mario299]

And that information should answer your questions Kees, nice reply manni.

 

[ducati05]

Kees, I think most of the guys on the board would agree that there's a bit of a natural progression in the purchases we have made for our wives/girlfriends.  First the latest mobile, then a bit of gold jewelry, then the motorbike, then the pickup, then the house and then finally we invest in the poorly thought out business they are totally unqualified to own and operate. The vast majority of these businesses fail to ever make a profit and are eventually scrapped (usually sooner rather than later).

The rest of the gents in this thread are subjecting you to a bit of banter not just because you screwed up the order of the essential Thai girl purchases, but because of the scale of your error. 450,000 baht is an absolutely enormous amount of money to a rural Thai girl in her situation.  I understand and commend you for your good intentions, but you have now created a certain set of expectations amongst her and her family. Hopefully, everything works out well for you but, I think most of the guys on the board would agree that in these situations good deeds rarely go unpunished and good intentions are even less frequently appreciated.

 Yes I'm afraid you are %100 correct..... I followed your example of natural progression to the word, but it took me 4 years to get up to the pick-up stage and house, so there is no great expectations on me to come up with the next big purchase...
   Good advice to all new guys.// Take Your Time... 

[Bigbus]

nicely said manni....good advice...

[nookiebear]

There seems to be far too many so called "Newbies" on this particular thread

[Vombatus]

There seems to be far too many so called "Newbies" on this particular thread

And one too many "Gifted Poster"  -  FFS !!

[ducati05]

There seems to be far too many so called "Newbies" on this particular thread

   And the LORD had spoken.....

[mario299]

There seems to be far too many so called "Newbies" on this particular thread

I didn't call myself a "", BE.com did.
I am certainly not new to much around these parts, except to posting on "your" forum, so if I have committed some kind of " error" by telling a poster that his post was a good one, then perhaps after a few more posts by me then I will no longer be a "".

Guess we'll have to see.

[Adam]

The Oracle is back on form....welcome back Nookie 

[KeesM]

The mystery deepens.

Kees now tells us that his girl is NOT paying 7000bt to his girls parents (No 1 family), but instead to her No 2 family, living in the Buriram area, and comprising uncles, aunts nephews, nieces etc. I think this is the first time you mentioned that Kees.

very first post in this chat: "Her family lives in Phimai. And she wanted to start a shop in Buriram."

[KeesM]

   Thank you Manni,

1. all the things you mentioned: she will never get from me, simple because I don't have the money.
2. she never asked for those, just for the shop; to me a sign she really wants to be selfsupporting. (ok: most of ppl here differ opinion with me)
3. because she skipped asking for all the - apparantly required according to the majority here - gifts, was also a sign for me this one could be different.
4. each time we talk I keep telling her that I have no more money for the next few years because I have to pay back the bank. I am quite confident the message will be passed to the family. And a time passes by and there is no more money coming, I suppose I will get through to them.

I have been in India. Build a "house" (price approx 50.000 Baht) for a girl who had been burned by her husband.  ((yes, nowadays that still happens everyday in India)) The family took possession of the house. So when I returned she wanted me to build her another one. I refused. cost me a lot of fights with her and the family, year after year, and then finally they stopped asking money.  It's just to show that I am already used to that.

[KeesM]

well, actually didn't want to spend a word on Nookie because of all the bullshit he is placing here, but finally there was quite unexpected also 1 usefull comment :"Decent houses are rented here in Nong Ki /Sakut for around 1500 baht/month"

Right, thank you. please give me some addresses in Buriram City. I would be delighted if I could find a place for her to stay for that price. Doesn't need to be a house, an appartment is also ok.

[Prakhonchai Nick]

Kees now tells us that his girl is NOT paying 7000bt to his girls parents (No 1 family), but instead to her No 2 family, living in the Buriram area, and comprising uncles, aunts nephews, nieces etc. I think this is the first time you mentioned that Kees.

very first post in this chat: "Her family lives in Phimai. And she wanted to start a shop in Buriram."

Correct Kees - but you never said she was staying in Buriram -only that she could not stay in the Buriram shop. That implied, and I asked, was she commuting to and from Phimai.

Anyway, I hope someone can steer you towards some rented accommodationin Buriram, for a lot less than the 7000bt you are currently shelling out.

[manni]

Kees, I think you will find that locating a house or apartment for your girlfriend is a boots on the ground project. I doubt you'll have much success asking for phone numbers on the forum.  Most of the guys here probably dont live in 1500 baht per month accomodations and many of the people offering them for rent wont be able to speak English to an extent that will help you.  Your girlfriend could easily walk around the area she wants to live in and find a suitable place. This is of course assuming she wants to live on her own and away from her relatives.

Regardless of what you tell her about your finances, I doubt the message will get through to her family. Even a penniless Dutchman is a rich farang to her family. Eventually (more likely soon) there will be a need for additional money, whether it be real or fabricated. Her family will pressure her to ask you for that money. Either you will send her the money or you wont.  Send her the money and you are a buffalo, to both her family and all the fellas or the board.  If you dont send the money the fellas on the board might think there's some hope for you afterall, but to her family you're then a cheapskate who can't or wont take care of her. Either way, you will resent her for asking you for more and more money despite buying her the shop,but really the fault lies with you. You just gave her the equivalent of what she can earn in years.  You did a bad job of managing her and her family's expectations.