Thai culture vs Farang culture.

[rufusredtail]

Money was never mentioned. She told me that Thai women were generally put down by their husbands. Only washing, cleaning etc etc.
She said that Thai men don't show any affection.  BY STARMAN

Why is this so , are Thais  bought up this way , taught to think like this , why does a man who is married put his wife down, to others, really is hard to believe they dont show affection , i know from my gf , they do not like to kiss in public or around the family ,  even holding there hand in public , i think Thai men in general think they are above the female and not equal , it takes two to tango as they say, be interesting to know thoughts on the Thai man in general. 

[urleft]

What I see:

- In a village, women work while the men drink.   Most local businesses are run by women. 

- Status matters.  You get points (status) for what your spouse does.  Have a Farang, you get status.  Have money, you get status.

- When a Thai asks to borrow money, it really means give it to them and do not expect to be paid back. 

- All Farangs are rich, so all spouses of Farang are rich. 

- When you borrow a car, you are under no obligation to put gas in it.

-  If you have some money, you should share with all in villiage that might ask to "borrow".

[rufusredtail]

Yes i have heard this before , you know if someone ask me here in Australia to borrow money , FORGET IT , would have to be a very good friend for me to do this , i know my gf has learnt money to friends she knows , and received it back , i was asked to loan 10.000 thb to a friend of hers and to paid back in 6 months time , it just goes against the grain with a westerner to do this , and yes i have noticed in the village , nearly all Thai women in shops , but really whyyyyyyyyyyyyyy is it status , if i owned a shop here , no one would give a dam , where is it status in Thailand , because most are poor , is that it 

[urleft]

My spouse's aunt married a Farang, she was the main woman in the village.  Then I helped my GF and things changed.  Now there are family problems, Grandfather arguing with daughter, all because Grand daughter now has best business and BF.  Not to mention everyone asking to borrow money, even grandfather. 

Just have to teach Thai wife that loan is paid back, with interest.

[rufusredtail]

I have meet the head man in the village on numerous occasions , and didn't know of his position until told by someone, most in the village know about me , word of mouth , and meet many who i now know by site , at funeral, wedding , song kran, only been asked once for money and through my gf , no one else has ever approached , may be because they speak no English , but getting back to the status question , from me been a farang , i would not know as you say that points (status) from my gf having 2 jobs , or having a car , makes her go up the ladder as they say , might have to read up on this aspect of status , reading material ?

[Dave the Dude]

My spouse's aunt married a Farang, she was the main woman in the village.  Then I helped my GF and things changed.  Now there are family problems, Grandfather arguing with daughter, all because Grand daughter now has best business and BF.  Not to mention everyone asking to borrow money, even grandfather. 

Just have to teach Thai wife that loan is paid back, with interest.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY URLEFT and I hope your wife can succeed.
I find that taking gold as security seems to help with repayments!

[Paddyram]

I have 'lent' money to people on the village in the past.  We don't live in Thailand full-time so mostly these 'cousins' approach through my wife's mother.  But in each case she gets them to hand over the chanute for their land until it is paid back.  Sometimes when they can't pay the money back, we get paid back in rice (usually rice from the same land).  Her father then sells the rice in town when he has too much stored up.
I know some of the village talk about my wife's mother behind her back saying that she doesn't take enough care of her family (with my money), but I have to say i think shes brilliant.    If it was left up to my Father-in-law, who is a soft touch for 'sick buffalo' sob story after a few whiskeys, then I would be broke.  I got my Father-in-law a car, but my Mother-in-law keeps the keys. His brothers (my wife's uncles) constantly ask for a lend of the car to go somewhere, it's my mother-in-law that says no.  So this is one farang that really appreciates his Thai Mother-in-law.   

[rufusredtail]

Seems to be a real problem in Thailand borrowing money, in the west different, is it that they dont manage what money they have properly , must be many reasons, i for one have never borrowed money from friends, family , only from the bank under contract, i just would not ask friends, i would feel guilty doing this and the shame of it , knowing that you cannot support yourself, i understand some just dont have a choice , but many Thais from what i understand , dont go to a bank to borrow money, why is this. 

[Vombatus]

Seems to be a real problem in Thailand borrowing money, in the west different, is it that they dont manage what money they have properly , must be many reasons, i for one have never borrowed money from friends, family , only from the bank under contract, i just would not ask friends, i would feel guilty doing this and the shame of it , knowing that you cannot support yourself, i understand some just dont have a choice , but many Thais from what i understand , dont go to a bank to borrow money, why is this. 

It is called a 'Fool's Errand'.

They don't because:-

(a) They are not creditworthy.
(b) The bank won't lend to them.
(c) They fear authority.

[rufusredtail]

Seems to be a real problem in Thailand borrowing money, in the west different, is it that they dont manage what money they have properly , must be many reasons, i for one have never borrowed money from friends, family , only from the bank under contract, i just would not ask friends, i would feel guilty doing this and the shame of it , knowing that you cannot support yourself, i understand some just dont have a choice , but many Thais from what i understand , dont go to a bank to borrow money, why is this. 

It is called a 'Fool's Errand'.

They don't because:-

(a) They are not creditworthy.
(b) The bank won't lend to them.
(c) They fear authority.

  Well they must borrow somewhere , there cannot be that many people around to borrow money off , why is it they fear authority , reason ?. many Thais have a business , you cannot tell me they dont need  money to start a business , be interested to know your thoughts

[Prakhonchai Nick]

Nearly everyone in my village borrows money -either to repay a gambling debt, to buy the "lucky number" they dreamt of in the lottery, pay for kids schooling, or for rice growing expenses. Nobody it seems has any sort of business. The loans are provided in the main by village sharks, who charge 5-10% interest a month. Those borrowing (mainly women) generally repay the interest once they have received money either their mans monthly wage or from their daughters horizontal dancing fees. Often the debt takes years to repay since most sharks require the loan to be paid back one time in full, rather than in installments.

[Vombatus]

Nearly everyone in my village borrows money -either to repay a gambling debt, to buy the "lucky number" they dreamt of in the lottery, pay for kids schooling, or for rice growing expenses. Nobody it seems has any sort of business. The loans are provided in the main by village sharks, who charge 5-10% interest a month. Those borrowing (mainly women) generally repay the interest once they have received money either their mans monthly wage or from their daughters horizontal dancing fees. Often the debt takes years to repay since most sharks require the loan to be paid back one time in full, rather than in installments.

There is a Chinese guy in Prakhonchai who has over 450 chanotes. These have been acquired over the years from villagers defaulting on loans.

The cynics might suggest that the educationally superior Chinese have taken advantage of the somewhat gullible Thais.

If anyone has any personal knowledge of a Buriram Thai walking into a local bank and getting a conventional personal loan (as we know it), I would be interested (and surprised).

Fear of authority ? Not sure, my personal view would be lack of trust and expectation of corruption.   

[rufusredtail]

OK excepted , but what are the banks  there for, i think there is one in ban kraut, and probably a few in where ever you live, really what your saying is they dont have credit cards , they dont go to the bank to borrow money, they borrow off loan sharks , what a way to live, 5 to 10% is more than a loan charges at the bank here , 7.60% now i think , well how does one go if say they are buying a car , do you get a Hugh discount if you are paying cash money , HOW  do you all buy things as milk, cigs , food , petrol , do you all pay cash , or do you use a card , be interested to know, and by the way its bloody cold here 11 Celsius and the fire going , and 30 c , you must be able to fry eggs at that temperature.

[Prakhonchai Nick]

There is a huge difference between living in Bangkok and the countryside.

Cash is used for most everything, although in the supermarkets, debit cards are frequently used. Credit cards are rarely used, and even for things that we use credit cards for in the west (and presumably Aus/NZ), like petrol, cards are rarely used as there is normally a 3% surcharge.

Cars and motorbikes are generally bought on dealer arranged finance, rather than bank loans. There is much competition though between different makes, and some good deals are possible. Ford are currently offering 0% finance for 4 years. Discounts for cash are rare - you are more likely to get some extras thrown in if you buy on finance as the dealer receives a kickback from the finance house.

The interest rates I quoted for loans was PER MONTH, and not annual!

[rufusredtail]

Really makes you wonder how the banks survive , i did ask my gf , What interest do the banks give you,for your money in there bank , not much at all, not worth doing, i do everything on a card , petrol ,food  buying air tickets to Thailand the lot , bec i get points for every dollar spent , and as long as you pay the card off in full , no interest , plus you get 55 days to pay off, really has become a cashless society here , even when i work i get paid online , funds are instant , you can spend on that day , where as a chq you have to wait 3 to 4 days to clear,  the Thai system is a little crazy , in ways , some charge here for credit cards , 1 to 3% in small shops , big supermarkets , petrol stations , never do, do you ever see a chq written to pay for anything ?