SIN SOD question. How much?

[Vombatus]

JT - King Canute couldn't change the tides - I doubt that you will fare any better.

All the parties involved in that little soap opera won't give a flying x what you think (or consider anything unusual in what happened) nor would they take kindly to a Falang sticking his nose into "Thai business". Although this was a Thai/Thai wedding I am aware that a Thai 13 year old was groomed for 3 years for presentation as a virgin to a European Falang.

YOU cannot change things so either accept some of the established practices in Thailand or you will have a difficult time settling in.

[Jon Terry]

CoCo,
 I won't ever except cultural differences on this subject, I know the damage it does to people first hand. i.e my sister was a victim of this crime and I know other victims too. And I know that this man has a illness that cannot be treated but should not be tolerated. I have no prejudice against sexual preference until it involves children. It took me a while to understand that in Thailand you are not really considered gay if you have sex with a Ladyboy ( if that floats your boat)  and I am very liberal with most subjects, but I draw the line with abuse. I know you have seen me rant on this site before then later calmed down, and I have truly appreciated your advice and support.
 but in my opinion this is different, maybe not for the Thai community and their Kay sara sara whatever happens was supposed to Karma ethos, Or some throw back from ancient times where she would be considered an adult.
You said you were aware that for 3 years she was being groomed for some European how is that acceptable or Thai culture?
Sounds like Child pimping to me.
If there daughter was kidnapped and sold on the street of Bangkok they would say it was an evil crime but if they groom her and do it themselves then it's OK? Hows that work?
If I am unable to settle in to Thai life because of my view on this subject then it's Thailand's loss not mine, and this guy will never walk on my land Thai or Falang. I so far have never found it difficult settling in Buriram and since my first visit have never been treated like a falang no special treatment I work in the fields,build around the village, attend meetings, and have the friendship and trust of the Mayor.In fact he introduces me as his English Son.
This is no dig at you CoCo just letting you and the rest of the Forum know where I stand on the subject.

[Vombatus]

Jon - I am not giving an opinion (I know you are not having a dig) or condoning anything.

What I am saying is that what happened is "bprohk ga dti" = standard/normal/routine.

What I am saying is that YOU have to live with that 'normality' if you choose Thailand to be your home. YOU don't have to condone but you have to recognise that it exists and deal with it. Your views are as insignificant as your views might be on Thais driving habits.

They won't change in the forseeable future so you will have to learn to handle it. As we have discussed before any anger or aggression from you will only backfire on one person.

[Jon Terry]

CoCo,
 wise words again, I just can't  get my head around a fifty year old watching and waiting for a child to marry, if it was the girls 17-18year old boyfriend then yeah I can except that and I know that this is not just a Thailand issue and bad things happen everywhere but it won't be condoned at my house here in the UK or my home in Buriram.
I except it happens but I don't have to like it. And to lighten the mood a little when I got married in the village the rumour that spread around a few day before the wedding was my wife was marrying a 17 year old English boy!!
But unfortunately the married years have aged me a fair bit. 

[Frank Frank]

The problem Jon is i doubt the thai family really cares and your views wont make one dot of difference,or do you think otherwise?

[Jon Terry]

I agree Frank, my views won't make the slightest bit of difference to the family or anybody else, but they are are mine and I feel they are  100% correct.
The sad thing is in poor countries money can get you what you want, be it Thailand or not. and I'm sure that if any western country had the economics of a south-east asian county the same thing would go on, in fact it does from eastern Europe.
does it make it right? No chance!
My views won't change anything but I have a right to express them, and if anyone thinks my values on this specific subject are wrong regardless of cultural differences say so it's their  right to have their opinion but I doubt we would get on very well.

[Prakhonchai Nick]

Too true.
Just had a Thai wedding in the Village were a 50 year old man married a 15 ( just) year old girl.The wife said it was OK as he paid 100k .As all Thais know ,if young flesh is your thing you have to dig deep 

This is sick stuff, in fact it is the saddest thing I have read on this site, how can it be OK to let your kids be abused, how can the family stand for it and how can the police stand by and do x all, don't say they don't know everyone in village life knows some police and unless I'm mistaken this news would travel quicker than this post gets uploaded to this forum, so cops are bound to know.
100k  or 1000000000000000k so fucking what!!! How much do you need to make it "OK" to kill somebody then. This C**T is a nonse and if anyone here thinks otherwise stay the x away from me when I'm back in Thailand, and this fucking paedophile better not be in my village either cause he won't enjoy my company.

Happens all the time out in the Villages John,the sad fact is, its up to the parents to press charges not for the Police to act on information. The age of consent is 15 in Thailand if the parents say its OK ( Thais with Thais) but the law says any parent can have a man or young lad charge with rape if their daughter is under 20 and if they refuse to pay money for having sex with their daughter.
Some things in Thailand you can never get your head round 

The age of consent is indeed 15, but I don't think your statement that a man can be charged with rape if the girl is under 20 and he refuses to pay money for having sex is totally correct

In the villages, many parents will try and obtain money from a boy if he has had sex with the daughter (or even try and force a marriage) , and most boys and their families duly oblige, BUT, I do not think there is any law to enforce this, especially where the sex was consensual. Perhaps Tonyc, you can provide specifics on the law.

Last year in my village, 2 14 year olds "married" (village wedding only -not registered) their 18/19 year old boyfriends, whilst one girl, now just 17 has given birth to her 3rd child!

Young kids, 13,14 and 15 will have sex these days, some even younger, and there is very little that can be done to stop this, But a parent condoning this by allowing a 14/15 year old to marry her boyfriend is obnoxious. They don't care about their children -it's only the 30/40,000bt sin sod that matters!

[Tonyc]

The age of consent is indeed 15, but I don't think your statement that a man can be charged with rape if the girl is under 20 and he refuses to pay money for having sex is totally correct

In the villages, many parents will try and obtain money from a boy if he has had sex with the daughter (or even try and force a marriage) , and most boys and their families duly oblige, BUT, I do not think there is any law to enforce this, especially where the sex was consensual. Perhaps Tonyc, you can provide specifics on the law.

Last year in my village, 2 14 year olds "married" (village wedding only -not registered) their 18/19 year old boyfriends, whilst one girl, now just 17 has given birth to her 3rd child!

Young kids, 13,14 and 15 will have sex these days, some even younger, and there is very little that can be done to stop this, But a parent condoning this by allowing a 14/15 year old to marry her boyfriend is obnoxious. They don't care about their children -it's only the 30/40,000bt sin sod that matters!

You are correct Nick in all you say Nick.Not sure if I could find a actual Law that states my claim as I'm not a lawyer  but however parts of the Prevention and Suppression of Prostitution Act which disallow any sexual contact with prostitutes under the age of 18, are widely interpreted by some local authorities to cover sexual acts classed as "obscenity for personal gratification". Also from the Penal Code Amendment Act of 1997 Section 283bis, having sex with a child under 18 is a compoundable offense even with the consent of that person. The parent or the child may file charges against the other side if he or she later regrets his or her own action. This ostensibly makes the Thai unfettered age of consent 18.
All I know is in the 8 years I have lived in our Village NOT ONE family has refused to pay money when a man/boy has been caught having sex with a girl under 18 or even up to 20.!!!

Here is a link from TV with may be of some interest .... http://www.thaivisa.com/forum/topic/333734-the-legal-age-in-thailand-is-20/

[Prakhonchai Nick]

Very interesting Tonyc. I will try and look closely at the various laws.

As you say, practically everyone pays, largely due to their ignorance of the law, and belief of everything they are told.

I am waiting the day sometime in the future when a mother knocks on my door as a result of my son having had consensual sex with her daughter. She will not find me an easy pushover.!

[Vombatus]

Very interesting Tonyc. I will try and look closely at the various laws.

As you say, practically everyone pays, largely due to their ignorance of the law, and belief of everything they are told.

I am waiting the day sometime in the future when a mother knocks on my door as a result of my son having had consensual sex with her daughter. She will not find me an easy pushover.!

I suspect that YOU will probably be at the mother's door first - seeking payment for the daughter de-flowering your son. 

[Prakhonchai Nick]

Well said CoCO. It does take 2 to tango - and my son, like his father before him is not likely to be easily led astray!

[Tonyc]

Well said CoCO. It does take 2 to tango - and my son, like his father before him is not likely to be easily led astray!

Lady-boys always seem to have money in the local villages  ,no chances of any come backs form a girls parents after having a brief 30 minute relationship for some of the local young men. 

[toffo]

There isn't any such standard answer to the sin sod query, as every situation and marriage will be different.

Too true.
Just had a Thai wedding in the Village were a 50 year old man married a 15 ( just) year old girl.The wife said it was OK as he paid 100k .As all Thais know ,if young flesh is your thing you have to dig deep 

Where is this village as im seeing nothing like this happening in my village... Only news in my village is the big fat 16 year old is pregnant to a Thai boy ha..

[toffo]

Was it a Thai man that married a 15 year old or falang??? Also how did a falang man find a child in a village if thats the case... Im shocked that this could happen but my wife says its normal if he takes care of her and the family but i cant get my head around it     

[Nobby]

I am waiting the day sometime in the future when a mother knocks on my door as a result of my son having had consensual sex with her daughter. She will not find me an easy pushover.!

Been there done that and it stinks. I refused to pay money for the stupid f****er and said he can go to prison and learn a lesson.

Seen and heard about it many times between the peasants.
Seriously, most village families know less about Thai law than us aliens!!! FFS! 

p.s. I also think its child abuse too!!!