Happy Endings Golf Society

[Vombatus]

I can relate to that.

[TBWG]

Me To!

Frank

I gather Zimmer are interested in aquiring the patent for your Go Golf Zimmer ~~~ don't be bought off too cheaply!

TBWG

[Clasta]

I'm back in Buriram since 2 days and I will probably join you for a game on Thursday. Looking forward to see you again

"Lefty"

[Bigbus]

Busy Day.....


My boss phoned me today.
He said, "Is everything okay at the office?"

I said, "Yes, it's all under control. It's been a very busy day, I haven't
stopped."

"Can you do me a favor?" he asked.

I said, "Of course, what is it?"

He said, "Hurry up and take your shot, I'm in the foursome two groups behind you."

[Bigbus]

The Old Golfer.....







An old golfer comes in from a round of golf at a new
course and heads into the grill room.
As he passes through the swinging doors he
sees a sign hanging over the bar:

COLD BEER:                     $2.00
HAMBURGER:                   $2.25
CHEESEBURGER:              $2.50
CHICKEN SANDWICH :       $3.50
HAND JOB:                     $50.00

Checking his wallet to be sure he has the necessary payment,
the old golfer walks up to the bar and beckons to
the exceptionally attractive female bartender who is
serving drinks to a couple of sun-wrinkled golfers.
She glides down behind the bar to the old golfer.
"Yes?" she inquires with a wide, knowing smile,
"May I help you?"
The old golfer leans over the bar and whispers,
"I was wondering, young lady," he whispers,
"are you the one who gives the hand-jobs?"

She looks into his eyes with that wide smile and purrs:
"Yes Sir , I sure am."
The old golfer leans closer and into her left ear and says softly,
"Well, wash your hands real good because
I want a cheeseburger."

[Tonyc]

I've just checked my wallet....I've got $52 ..I know what I'm ordering 




























20 cheeseburgers and a cold beer 

[Prakhonchai Nick]

You'll probably have a long wait Tonyc.  Coco's having the $50 offering, and he finishes slowly. 

[Tonyc]

You'll probably have a long wait Tonyc.  Coco's having the $50 offering, and he finishes slowly. 

Yes heard it takes him a long time to get round 9 holes 

[Prakhonchai Nick]

Never mind 9 - he's knackered after just one!   

[Tonyc]

Never mind 9 - he's knackered after just one!   

I like the course's where they have 3 hole's 

[Prakhonchai Nick]

 The main thing is that one gets to play around. 

[Tonyc]

The main thing is that one gets to play around. 

I want to ,I think my shaft needs  regripping‎ soon   

Any local shops in Buriram that offer this service

[Bigbus]

GOLF AND WHAT IT ALL MEANS

Golf can best be defined as an endless series of tragedies obscured by the occasional miracle,

followed by a good bottle of beer.

If you find you do not mind playing golf in the rain, the snow, even during a hurricane, here's a valuable tip: your life is in trouble.

Golfers who try to make everything perfect before taking the shot rarely make a perfect shot.

A 'gimme' can best be defined as an agreement between two golfers... neither of whom can putt very well.

An interesting thing about golf is that no matter how badly you play, it is always possible to get worse. Golf is the only sport where the most feared opponent is you.

Golf is like marriage: If you take yourself too seriously it won't work, and both are expensive.

The best wood in most amateurs' bags is the pencil.

[Bigbus]

David Letterman's Top Ten Reasons Why Golf Is Better Than Sex......


#10... A below par performance is considered damn good.
#09.... You can stop in the middle and have a cheeseburger and a couple of beers.
#08... It's much easier to find the sweet spot.
#07... Foursomes are encouraged.
#06... You can still make money doing it as a senior.
#05.... Three times a day is possible.
#04... Your partner doesn't hire a lawyer if you play with someone else.
#03... If you live in Florida , you can do it almost every day.
#02... You don't have to cuddle with your partner when you're finished.

And the NUMBER ONE reason why golf is better than sex..


#01... When your equipment gets old you can replace it.

[Bigbus]

THE ETHICS OF GOLF

No one ever promised all decisions would be easy!

What if you were playing in the club championship tournament finals and the
match was halved at the end of 17 holes.  You had the honor and hit your
ball a modest two hundred fifty yards to the middle of the fairway, leaving
a simple six iron to the pin.

Your opponent then hits his ball, lofting it deep into the woods to the
right of the fairway.

Being the golfing gentleman that you are, you help your opponent look for
his ball.  Just before the permitted five minute search period ends, your
opponent says: "Go ahead and hit your second shot and if I don't find it in
time, I'll concede the match."

You hit your ball, landing it on the green, stopping about ten feet from the
pin.

About the time your ball comes to rest, you hear your opponent from
deep in the woods: "I found It!". The second sound you hear is a click, the
sound of a club striking a ball and the ball comes sailing out of the woods
and lands on the green, stopping no more than six inches from the hole.

Now here is the ethical dilemma:

Do you pull the cheating bastard's ball out of your pocket and confront him
with it or do you keep your mouth shut.