Author Topic: A Naive Expat in Thailand (Read 146789 times)

pbee · « **Reply #30 on:** November 13, 2008, 06:04:43 AM »

Good stories and observations mate.Enjoyed them very much.Going over myself again soon,will try and post a tale or two in January when back in UK.Keep it up and good luck to you and family.

TBWG · « **Reply #31 on:** November 13, 2008, 09:34:15 PM »

Quote from: pbee on November 13, 2008, 06:04:43 AM

Good stories and observations mate.Enjoyed them very much.Going over myself again soon,will try and post a tale or two in January when back in UK.Keep it up and good luck to you and family.

Hi Pbee

Thanks for the comments much appreciated, if you post any tales don't expect to much response from members as they are extremely shy and obviously lack keyboards!

TBWG

dave the dude · « **Reply #32 on:** November 13, 2008, 09:41:48 PM »

Quote from: TBWG on November 13, 2008, 09:34:15 PM

Quote from: pbee on November 13, 2008, 06:04:43 AM
Good stories and observations mate.Enjoyed them very much.Going over myself again soon,will try and post a tale or two in January when back in UK.Keep it up and good luck to you and family.

Hi Pbee

Thanks for the comments much appreciated, if you post any tales don't expect to much response from members as they are extremely shy and obviously lack keyboards!

TBWG

I think they have keyboards but lack keyboard skills.

Dave (BTW we are trying to arrange another Buriram meets TWGM)

TBWG · « **Reply #33 on:** February 11, 2009, 09:06:05 PM »

Priorities

Whilst sitting in the market and consuming a few beers and adding to the hundreds of hours I have devoted to my thesis that the length of an attractive Thai teenage girls leg is in direct relation to the amount of material used in her skimpy shorts

. Whilst arriving at this conclusion I also noted other trends in Thai youth.

It occurred to me that their priorities have changed dramatically to that of their parents. I have come to the conclusion that the average teenage girl would now rather go without shoes than her mobile and the average teenage male would also rather go without shoes than his motorbike.

Despite the fact that flip flops cost next to nothing I have now seen many examples of this behaviour. If only they lived in a climate like the UK maybe frostbite would make them think differently!

TBWG

TBWG · « **Reply #34 on:** February 22, 2009, 09:58:45 PM »

Wots it all about!

As I travel around the country or more particularly Isaan I see all the legacies of Thaksins attempt to provide cheap affordable housing for the poor.

Now personally I would rather insert red hot chilli peppers up my anus

than live in one of these houses and I dread to think what they would be like after 6 months when the Buffalo, pigs, chickens, ......... insert as necessary have moved in downstairs. Not to mention when Somchai arrives home pi***d on the motorsai and cant tell one house from another.

But it does seem a shame that these almost completed houses are now standing empty and deserted. I have heard all the various stories as to why... corruption, poor quality, revenge on Thaksin. But does anyone have any inside info on the true reason?

TBWG

Mr.Steve · « **Reply #35 on:** April 18, 2009, 10:10:55 PM »

Democracy......................or what?

TBWG · « **Reply #36 on:** September 03, 2009, 10:39:43 PM »

Hi Bums

I'm back with a gripe!

To say I am bitterly disappointed is an understatement but I am afraid this is symptomatic of the current UK government and I should have known I would be let down

If they are not screwing Expats on their state pensions, or fiddling their expenses then they are making the usual promises and not delivering.

What am I drivelling on about, SWINE FLU thats what. They promised me that I would get it, ordered a squillion doses of Tamiflu just to make sure, even insisted that I had a good chance of dying from it and what happens .. naff all!

There was me updating my will and looking forward to a week in bed ... and nuffin!

I didn't even have an excuse to phone up the swine flu help line that employs dozens of experts and answers 3 calls a week.

So what have I had to do instead, DECORATING!

Now I should not be flippant because some people have died from it, but then people die every year from ordinary flu, I can't help thinking we were all sold a good story to stop us wingeing about the financial crisis the same government got us into, now even deeper after costs incurred due to swine flu heaped on top.

Jeez I sound cynical, must get back to Thailand ASAP and chill!

TBWG

Vombatus · « **Reply #37 on:** September 04, 2009, 05:39:45 AM »

For somebody who "would rather stick red hot chilli peppers up my anus", it is no wonder that you are getting these gripes

dave the dude · « **Reply #38 on:** September 04, 2009, 08:10:04 AM »

Quote from: TBWG on September 03, 2009, 10:39:43 PM

I didn't even have an excuse to phone up the swine flu help line that employs dozens of experts and answers 3 calls a week.

TBWG

Previously known as the Y2K helpline and shortly to be renamed the 'UK Civil War' helpline

TMWG, I think you need an Archa iintravenous drip to calm your nerves

DtD

TBWG · « **Reply #39 on:** September 04, 2009, 07:39:34 PM »

Quote from: Dave the Dude on September 04, 2009, 08:10:04 AM

Quote from: TBWG on September 03, 2009, 10:39:43 PM

I didn't even have an excuse to phone up the swine flu help line that employs dozens of experts and answers 3 calls a week.

TBWG

Previously known as the Y2K helpline and shortly to be renamed the 'UK Civil War' helpline

TMWG, I think you need an Archa iintravenous drip to calm your nerves

DtD

Hi DDt

Think you may be right wot's a large bottle of Archa cost these days?

TBWG

Lourens · « **Reply #40 on:** September 04, 2009, 08:41:53 PM »

It doesn't matter - It's still a bargain

TBWG · « **Reply #41 on:** September 05, 2009, 09:40:31 PM »

Quote from: TBWG on September 03, 2009, 10:39:43 PM

Hi Bums

I'm back with a gripe!

To say I am bitterly disappointed is an understatement but I am afraid this is symptomatic of the current UK government and I should have known I would be let down

If they are not screwing Expats on their state pensions, or fiddling their expenses then they are making the usual promises and not delivering.

What am I drivelling on about, SWINE FLU thats what. They promised me that I would get it, ordered a squillion doses of Tamiflu just to make sure, even insisted that I had a good chance of dying from it and what happens .. naff all!

There was me updating my will and looking forward to a week in bed ... and nuffin!

I didn't even have an excuse to phone up the swine flu help line that employs dozens of experts and answers 3 calls a week.

So what have I had to do instead, DECORATING!

Now I should not be flippant because some people have died from it, but then people die every year from ordinary flu, I can't help thinking we were all sold a good story to stop us wingeing about the financial crisis the same government got us into, now even deeper after costs incurred due to swine flu heaped on top.

Jeez I sound cynical, must get back to Thailand ASAP and chill!

TBWG

Hi Bums

Well I have just come across a previous post of mine and I suppose I must now admit that I might of been a bit hasty, in hindsight maybe they were right!!!

See previous post......................................

Hi Bums

Call me old fashioned but I am a bit sceptical about the effectiveness of this approach!

A group of rabbis and Jewish mystics have taken to the skies over Israel, praying and blowing ceremonial horns in a plane to ward off swine flu.

About 50 religious leaders circled over the country on Monday, chanting prayers and blowing horns, called shofars.

The flight's aim was "to stop the pandemic so people will stop dying from it", Rabbi Yitzhak Batzri was quoted as saying in Yedioth Ahronoth newspaper.

The flu is often called simply "H1N1" in Israel, as pigs are seen as unclean.

Eating pork is banned under Jewish dietary laws.

According to Israel's health ministry, there have been more than 2,000 cases of swine flu in the country, with five fatalities so far.

"We are certain that, thanks to the prayer, the danger is already behind us," added Mr Batzri was quoted as saying.

Television footage showed rabbis in black hats rocking backwards and forwards as they read prayers from Kabbalah, a form of Jewish mysticism which counts the singer Madonna among its devotees.

The shofar is the horn of a deer or sheep, and is used to mark major religious occasions in Judaism.

See for yourself~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/middle_east/8196786.stm

TBWG

TBWG · « **Reply #42 on:** October 22, 2009, 10:24:41 PM »

Hi Bums (rather appropriate)

Ring of fire........................

Well finally back in Thailand after a few months in the UK watching the economy go down the tubes, (but thats another story!)

Anyway, I want to get some sun on my back and some Phad Thai in my belly, so when the "boss lady" suggests a trip to try out a new restaurant for her Som Tam fix I am up for it.

So half way through and all of a sudden I am getting that uneasy feeling in the stomach and need a visit to the loo, the boss lady assures me that being a new place the toilet should at least be passable. Well no problems there a European type loo and a door that locks, that's progress!

Well after doing the business so to speak I reach for the loo paper, eh, none of it, only one of the bum squirter jobs. Having been caught out by these in the past I decide to remove my shorts and boxers to avoid walking around for half an hour with a wet arse after poor directional control.

Feeling smug, I now proceed to wash the offending area, no problems ....WTF!!!! all of a sudden I have super-heated, scalding water forced at about 45 PSI up my anus, sheesh, that smarts!

What I neglected to make allowance for was the fact that the water had been festering for many hours in the direct sunlight in god know's how many metres of that blue plastic tube just waiting for some sucker to expose his delicate parts for a steam cleaning. Cor, that was painfull!

I now gingerly made my way back to the table and finished my meal standing up, whilst explaining to the boss lady as to why was I squealing like a stuck pig and effing and blinding like a trooper whilst I was in the loo!

So a lesson learned the hard way .... in future send the missus in first!

TBWG

urleft · « **Reply #43 on:** October 22, 2009, 11:01:47 PM »

Quote from: TBWG on October 22, 2009, 10:24:41 PM

Hi Bums (rather appropriate)

Ring of fire........................

So half way through and all of a sudden I am getting that uneasy feeling in the stomach and need a visit to the loo, the boss lady assures me that being a new place the toilet should at least be passable. Well no problems there a European type loo and a door that locks, that's progress!

TBWG

Wooo, going to loo can be an adventure.

Having been raised in the west I never encounted Thai toilet until last year. I first saw the hose in 2007. Once it was explained to me how it was supposed to work I started to imagine having one of those hoses in the states. Think about using the hose in Mid December when it is -5 outside, that spray would cause the family jewels to curl up inside you

.

Yes, sometimes going to the throne is an experience in Thailand.

Wooo Wooo :blush:

Khun Tony · « **Reply #44 on:** October 25, 2009, 10:16:46 AM »

Hi TBWG,

I note in one of your interesting tales, you talk about a 90 day border hop. Have they now ceased that and only give you a 15 day border pass (by land) which means you will have tell 6 times more border hop stories. Or do you have some kind of 90 day visa that needs renewing every 90 days and if so what is the visa name and conditions.

regards

Tony

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